Growing up my mom had a very best friend…her name was Mery. They couldn’t be more different. My mom liked fancy things, Mery was simpler in her taste. Mami loved jewelry and makeup, and Mery only wore her wedding ring and a watch. Even with their extreme differences, my mom loved her and defended her, she never judged her. Their bond was a lesson for my sister and me.
We learned the value of relationship and the definition of friendship between women.
I have been fortunate to have my very own “Mery” in my life. It’s a friendship that has survived distance, marriages, children, and disagreements. But with all that in the mix, we have never lost the respect for each other. We talk about the hard things, the fun things and the all out amusing things. We have taken road trips together, celebrated, holidays, and birthdays. We cheer each other, and we keep each other in check when things look messy.
Relationships among women can be tricky. There’s a fine line of judgment, mixed in with a little jealousy. We can become resentful and suspicious in a minute. We can questions motives and downright tear each other apart.
We judge our appearance, our career, our home life, our children! We forget that each one of us, no matter the journey, have just that our OWN personal JOURNEY…
With age, I have come to learn the importance of female relationships in our lives. Everyone should have friends of all ages. Young woman, we can encourage and older women that can help us understand how to get around those roadblocks that come along, that only someone with experience can speak to, and we should have friends that are our contemporaries that we can laugh with, cry with and love.
We need to begin to hold each other up. Encourage each other. Compliment each other. Laugh we with each other. Just show up for each other!
Social media, magazines, movies, television and every other form of media scream at us how we are supposed to look, what we should be wearing, where we should be wearing it and how we should be wearing it! How we should wear our make (I mean how many makeup tutorials do we need), what’s the latest hairstyle and nail color? Everything is dictated to us so that we can look like mannequins. It manipulates how we interact with one another solely on our appearance.
That is judgement…that is a lie. Seek to be the voice of reason when judgment sets into a conversation. Try listening before accusing. Listen with an open heart. Respond with a kind word. Relate with a tender touch. Embrace with open arms.
If this seems too difficult to do, then allow yourself to be loved, listened to, welcomed and encouraged. Everyone you come across has a story. That is what makes us all unique.
Live your life as a running fountain. Pour into others the knowledge that has been poured into you.
Be the “Mery” in someone’s life.